Coffee Shop Bliss (sort of)
Every year we go to the west coast of Florida for a family vacation to visit with family. All year, I anticipate my early morning visits to the local coffee shop. Walking to town with my laptop in a backpack to a favorite coffee shop, sitting outside in beautiful weather and alternating between working and daydreaming. For the 13 months stuck home during Covid, I thought about these coffee shop visits quite a lot.
We finally went to Florida last week and I was so excited for my coffee shop visit. I set my alarm for 6:30 am, put aside my clothes so I wouldn’t have to find them when half asleep and tip-toed out of the house so as not to disturb anyone. The weather was perfect, warm with a breeze. I walked the five blocks to the coffee shop on empty streets and settled down with my journal and my delicious coffee.
Five minutes later, the leaf blower began. Now you may hate leaf blowers, but I guarantee you I hate them more. Nothing disregulates my nervous system more than their awful noise. So here I am, in my perfect spot, looking forward to the moment I had been imagining all year, and then the leaf blowers begin. And they never end--the entire time I am there (they are clearing an enormous parking lot).
This moment reminded me that when I long for these idealized moments, I imagine what they will be based on fantasy, not reality. What I imagine is going to be perfect rarely is. When I picture sitting with a cup of coffee in my fantasy, I never include the annoying things that crop up: the loud person sitting next to me, the bad weather, the too hot son. I picture it on the perfect day… bliss.
I still managed to enjoy my time at the coffee shop --despite the loud leaf blower. But the next time I long for my coffee in Florida when I am doing something boring or difficult at home, I will remember that things are rarely is perfect. I can still look forward to my Florida coffee shop work sessions, but I can remember that I am comparing my normal, regular life here to a fantasy life there. The difference between the two is not as dramatic as I think.
